Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki
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Basic Info[]

Senor Cardgage first appeared in the Strong Bad Email kind of cool. In this email, Strong Bad is asked what he would be like if he was not stylish and buff. He describes an ugly, dumpy version of himself who is, at least to Strong Bad, "so cool, you don't even know that he is cool". It turns out that Strong Bad's fictional character was apparently based on a creepy guy who lived down the street from The Brothers Strong when they were little, whose extreme sketchiness gave Strong Sad nightmares. Senor Cardgage resembles Strong Bad somewhat, both sharing a red with black markings lucha libre mask for a head, green eyes, pinkish torso, boxing gloves for hands and black pants. However, he's much taller than Strong Bad, wears yellow glasses, has a round head, a brown goatee, and a toupee resembling a comb-over. Senor Cardgage also has a flabby belly and much longer arms. His feet are simply black, suggesting they are covered by or are part of his pants.

Some of his traits include:

  • Suspiciously coming out of bushes and shrubs just as you walk by.
  • Pronouncing words incorrectly (for example, pronouncing "loans" as "lawns").
  • Always carrying an old plastic Aldi grocery bag of mysterious contents.
  • Loudly eating melty chocolate bars while standing too close to you in lines.
  • Smelling like pea soup] (according to Homestar Runner).
  • Speaking in phrases that are described by Strong Bad as "almost one word and not quite another," such as "excardon me" and "exobably not".
  • "Calling at you as if you were a lady", regardless of your gender.
  • Producing traffic sounds, even when there is seemingly no traffic nearby.

=^--^= Fanon[]

  • Cardgage is actively malicious, and is a pawn of the devil.
  • Cardgage's counterpart in 20X6 is either Stongoman or Darkoman.
  • Cardgage's greatest enemy is Homsar.
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